so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
my shit smells like andre
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Can you bring me the toilet please
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