I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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