Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
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