Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
