It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
