yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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