i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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