OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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