if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
