Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
