someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
So much Jack, so little girl.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
