Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
