margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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