News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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