So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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