But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
