TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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