i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
