i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
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