Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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