Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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