I am puke
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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