Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
