I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Why is your signature on my underwear?
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize