i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Randomize
