So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
