Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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