You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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