Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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