this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Randomize
