Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
