What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
she told me i tasted like america
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
