come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
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