..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
