Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
