I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
He did a backflip because drugs
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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