It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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