I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
