THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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