She announced her abortion via fbk
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
