I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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