found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Congratulations! We have a period
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
