the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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