btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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