'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
it hurts more in the daytime
i used baking grease as lip gloss
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
