What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
