Screwed.edu
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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