I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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