"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
