Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
