even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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